In late 2019, God started speaking to me about my past experiences of sexual violence, showing me that He wanted to heal my trauma. It was a bit of a surprise at the time, because I genuinely thought I’d already dealt with my past and was walking in freedom. I started to pray about it, but I soon realised I didn’t know or understand what the Bible says on the issue of male violence against women. I needed to know what God says about what happened to me.
When did you last hear someone preach on the rape of Tamar in 2 Samuel 13? Or the horrific story of the unnamed concubine in Judges 19? When did you last have a conversation about child marriage or domestic abuse, in church on a Sunday morning? Churches on housing estates or in more deprived, urban areas may see more evidence of violence and abuse, but we very rarely talk about it out in the open, or from the front. And the statistics show that in every church in the UK there will be women like me – women who need to know what God says about what happened (or what is happening) to them. Women who need support to heal from past hurts, or maybe even to escape present danger.
I’ve already mentioned 2 of the biblical stories of male violence against women and girls, but there are lots, covering different types of abuse, including sexual violence, kidnapping, domestic abuse, murder, forced marriage and rape as a weapon of war. If we fail to teach on these parts of the Bible, then we fail to speak into so many people’s lives and bring God’s truth for them. Paul tells Timothy (in 2 Timothy 3:16-17) that all Scripture is useful for teaching and training in righteousness, so that we may be thoroughly equipped for good works. Leaving these difficult and violent stories out is doing us all a disservice, not just those with lived experience of violence.
If we study the biblical stories of violence against women and girls for ourselves and start talking about and teaching on what God says about it, that will have some beautiful consequences for our communities. People will recognise that our churches are safe places to report abuse and seek help. Perpetrators of abuse within our churches will know that their behaviour will not be tolerated, covered up or allowed to continue, which will transform relationships. Victims and survivors of abuse will find freedom and healing in Jesus, which will change their lives and the lives of those around them. We will all come to know God’s character better and be more fully equipped to follow Him. As I studied the biblical stories of violence for myself, I encountered the “One Who Sees” (Genesis 16:13); the God who knows my name, hears my voice and loves me beyond measure. The God who hates all forms of violence and abuse, who sent Jesus to rescue us from all sin and restore this broken world to how it was supposed to be all along, a world without abuse.
So, is it true that churches on housing estates or in more deprived, urban areas may see more evidence of male violence against women, and abuse in general? Is that a fair assessment? And if we see more evidence of it, does that mean there’s more of it going on? Of course, abuse does happen in affluent areas – it truly is a global issue, affecting every nation and people group on earth, and people of every social class within each people group, rich and poor. My Cover to Cover Bible Study on Violence Against Women looks at (among others) the stories of Hagar, a slave, and Tamar, a princess, two women with vastly different social status. But women living in deprivation or poverty experience a range of different risk factors from those living in relative wealth.
In 2016, Agenda Alliance’s report Joining the Dots, funded by the Joseph Rowntree Foundation, combined data on women’s experiences of poverty, mental health, life circumstances, and abuse and violence, to paint a picture of how different forms of inequality combine in the lives of women in poverty in England. The report found that women in poverty are twice as likely as other women to experience almost every form of interpersonal violence and abuse covered in the study. The combination of abuse alongside poverty creates a web of adversity in women’s lives.
The key is security, or lack of it. Women living in deprivation or poverty may lack certain protections. They might face isolation and relational insecurity, physical and housing insecurity, financial and employment insecurity, emotional insecurity and health insecurity. The more risk factors or insecurities at play, the more vulnerable a woman is to violence or abuse. Let’s look at a few in more detail.
Financial and employment insecurity will be a huge issue for women in areas of poverty or deprivation. What might a woman feel like she must put up with to keep her job and earn enough money to live on? It is far harder to stand up to sexual harassment or abuse in the workplace if you simply cannot afford to risk losing your job, especially if you have a family to feed. We know that some women end up involved in the sex industry, a form of sexual violence and exploitation, which can also open the door to other forms of violence and abuse.
Thinking about emotional or mental health insecurity, some of the women we encounter may already be survivors of trauma. Some of us live and serve in areas welcoming refugees and asylum seekers, some of whom have experienced rape as a weapon of war, child marriage, female genital mutilation, or other abuses in their country of origin. Victims and survivors of past abuse may be suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder or other mental health difficulties which leave them vulnerable to further abuse. Addictions will also fall under this category of risk. A woman suffering from drug addiction will often be unable to physically protect herself from violence when she is under the influence of drugs and will be vulnerable to sexual exploitation as she struggles to fund her addiction.
Physical and housing insecurity is a risk factor for violence experienced disproportionately by women living in poverty. In a situation of domestic abuse, some women stay in that abusive relationship because they simply have nowhere else to go. They weigh up the risks and decide that an unsafe home environment is better than homelessness. And of course, women who do find themselves homeless are at an even greater risk of violence. Just last year a homeless woman was brutally attacked in Cardiff city centre, but homeless women regularly experience incidents of lower-level violence and abuse.
These risk factors or insecurities are precisely the reason God tells His people to look out for certain at-risk groups. They are not a 21st century issue. The Bible repeatedly tells us to do good to orphans, widows and foreigners. But God had a plan for the poor and oppressed all along, a plan for rescue. Jesus is good news for the poor and good news for women and girls at risk of male violence, and the Church is part of the outworking of that good news.
At the Proximity Conference in Manchester in June 2024, Andy Hawthorne was warning against ‘playing with sin’ and he mentioned how so many strong leaders have failed in recent years and fallen into sin. He didn’t even specifically name sexual sin or male violence against women, but for me, a man acknowledging this part of the Church’s recent history, from a conference platform, was huge. If you were there, perhaps you remember it too. It sent a message that the conference was a safe place to talk about abuse, that a survivor of violence would be listened to and believed. I was reminded how powerful it can be, just talking about something.
Talking about male violence against women and girls in our churches shows people they are safe places to report abuse; that victims and survivors will be listened to and believed. So, let’s think about how we can do that and what might be appropriate in our own settings.
What can I do?
If you have a church building, or a community café or other ministry setting, you might want to consider sticking signs on the back of your toilet doors, signposting visitors to a charity that supports victims and survivors of violence. Stickers and posters are widely available from charities like Women’s Aid, Refuge, Rape Crisis and Restored, as well as local support services. In addition to showing people where to get help, these stickers are a visible sign that you take abuse seriously and can be trusted to react well to any reports. An alternative could be a pile of flyers, or a poster on a noticeboard.
If you’re a church leader or preacher, you might want to teach on one of the biblical stories of violence against women at least once a year. This would be a regular opportunity to show any newcomers that your church is a safe place to report abuse, and to take a good look at God’s heart for women. You might find my Cover to Cover Bible Study on Violence Against Women a helpful resource for sermon preparation, or you might want to use it for a small group study to take a closer look at the subject. If you feel unable to speak on violence against women, you might want to contact an outside organisation (like Restored) for training, or to invite a visiting speaker.
If you’re involved in leading a church or ministry, raising up female voices and female leaders can be a powerful weapon in the fight to end violence against women. Hearing women’s stories encourages empathy between the sexes, and seeing women in positions of leadership discourages male entitlement or superiority. A sense of entitlement and a lack of empathy are common themes in situations of abuse. Jesus’ treatment of women in the gospels was so counter-cultural because he challenged these attitudes, and so can we.
You may want to consider supporting a local or national charity which helps women affected by violence. You could offer financial support through fundraising, you could commit to pray regularly for their work, or you could volunteer.
Wherever you live, work or serve, something we can all do is pray; let’s dare to pray for an end to all forms of male violence against women and girls. And let’s encourage and teach others to pray for that too.
